Count Bacula

loxodonta penis anatomy
The Bacula Research Project (BRP) needs your help! The group is studying the variety of bacula found in the mammal family and is trying to locate a few unusual specimens of baculum.

“WHAT’S A BACULUM?” you’re probably asking. It’s the penis bone. Now don’t get excited, you don’t have one. Humans are amongst the few animals that don’t have bacula. Along with Koala Bears and duck billed platypuses, when we get a hard on, its hard from blood pressure alone. Other beasties get an erection with no viagra necessary, they’re hard as a bone in seconds because they have a bone there already.

various bacula

various bacula

I was recently contacted by a researcher for the Bacula Research Project in need of a few specimens.

The first is the American Hog-nosed Skunk (Conepatus leuconotus). Found in the American Southwest this skunk is distinguished from other skunks by a single, solid white stripe down it’s back and a bald, pink nose. If you don’t mind getting intimate with skunk dick, contact me.

you want my WHAT?

you want my WHAT?

The other two creatures are both moles.
Coast Mole (Scapanus orarius) Townsend’s Mole (Scapanus townsendii). Both are found in the Pacific Northwest. For these we’ll probably need the whole specimen, as the mole penis is an organ so minute they respond to every male enhancement add they see, or to quote the BRP “The bacula from these two species of moles are less than 0.5mm in diameter and would require a microscope to confirm. Unless you know what your looking for and where its located, the baculum located in the distal portion of the penile organ would be removed along with the dermal skinning of the carcass. The baculum is a heterotopical bone and therefore not part of the skeletal system.”

Contact me if you’re in the north woods and interested in trapping moles.

Monster Mondays: Real Vampire Animals


vampire bat, originally uploaded by Boju.

Every so often I get someone in the shop who asks me if I think vampires are real in a tone so serious I know if I say “yes” they’ll offer to suck my blood. So I usually dodge the question.

Of course I know people can and do drink blood, but that doesn’t make someone a vampire any more than hiding eggs makes you an Easter bunny.

There are however a host of real life creatures that live on blood, have retractable fangs, and fly through the night in a way far more vampire-like then any mortal human ever could hope to be. They are the real life vampires and they will be scored by how much more vampiric they are then the guy in Twilight.

1. The Vampire Mocking Bird

How alike are vampire mockingbirds and real vampires? Consider the following.
1. Both can fly.
2. Both live off blood.
3. Vampires preferred victims are buxom maidens in skimpy nightgowns.Vampire mockingbirds preferred victims are masked boobies.
4. Vampires are notoriously eloquent. Mockingbirds have the most versatile vocal range of any bird and can memorize over 200 unique songs patterns.
5. Lily Munster, a vampire, lived at 1313 Mockingbird lane. Vampire Mockingbirds, which are found in the Galapagos, have been spotted nesting at 3131 Lily Munster lane!

Overall Vampiric Score for the Vampire Mocking Bird- 5 times more Vampiric then the guy in Twilight.

2. Vampire Squid.

How alike are vampire squids and vampires? Consider the following-
1. Vampires only come out at night. Vampire squids are only found in the sea depths where it is always night because no light penetrates.
2. Both Dracula and Vampire Squids are noted for their demonic red eyes.
3. Instead of canine teeth, vampires have fangs. Instead of suckers, Vampire squid tentacles are covered in fangs.
4. Vampires where capes that resemble bat wings. A vampire squid has a webbing around it’s tentacles that resembles both a cape AND bat wings. Bonus points!

Overall Vampire Score for the Vampire Squid- 4.5

3. Vampire Finch

Pretty much the same as the Vampire Mockingbird, but without as much of a voice. However, bonus surprise point for being menacing while still a finch.

Vampire score: 4

4. Chinese Water Deer

Holy crap, did you see that? Does that deer have fangs?



Dude. Not only does the Chinese Water Deer have fangs, but they’re attached to their sockets with powerful muscles so that the can be extended and retracted just like a vampire!


Amazing! But they don’t drink blood or fly. Vampire score: 2

Many endangered bats being illegally collected.

A Chinese Pipestrelle Bat Skeleton. One of the most comonly sold bat specimens. Chinese Pipistrelle or Pipistrellus pulveratus is listed on the IUCN Red list (1996) of Threatened Species.

A Chinese Pipestrelle Bat Skeleton. One of the most commonly sold bat specimens. Chinese Pipistrelle or Pipistrellus pulveratus is listed on the IUCN Red list (1996) of Threatened Species.

Notice: Dapper Cadaver will no longer be carrying authentic bat specimens as many species of bats are threatened or endangered and are being illegally collected. If you have any love of these creatures please do not purchase any more bat related products.  We love both bats and bat specimens at Dapper Cadaver and our decision to discontinue them was not any easy choice to make, but it was the right choice to make.

It is the policy of Dapper Cadaver to not trade in specimens of any threatened species, only common game, livestock, lab raised, or pest animals. All other specimens are replicas.

The plight of formerly common bats was brought to my attention by the Bat World Sanctuary. I support their efforts and have posted a copy of our exchange below.

From: Bat World Sanctuary <sanctuary@batworld.org>
Subject: bat specimens in jars
To: info@dappercadaver.com
Cc: BWCenters@yahoogroups.com
Date: Wednesday, October 29, 2008, 1:51 PM

<!–#yiv378659085 #yiv1743718215 DIV {margin:0px;}–>

Dear Dapper Cadaver Owner,

I am disappointed to see your company selling real bat specimens in jars. The bats that end up in these jars are healthy, wild caught mothers collected in NM. They are harvested during baby season, leaving behind an infant to starve to death. These bats have a potential lifespan of 25 years in the wild and will eat millions of insects in their lifetime:

http://www.dappercadaver.com/specimen-jar-32oz-bat-p-746.html

http://www.dappercadaver.com/diaphonized-bat-p-568.html

Bat populations are in severe decline around the world, and free-tailed bats are listed as a species of Special Concern by US Fish and Wildlife. I hope that you will consider not selling this item. I look forward to your response.

Sincerely,

Amanda

Amanda Lollar, Founder/President

Bat World Sanctuary

www.batworld.org

Bat World Sanctuary is a non-profit,
all volunteer organization that provides
rescue
for bats worldwide. For more
information
about bats and how they
make our world a better place please
visit
www.batworld.org

From: BJ W <customcorpse@yahoo.com>
To: Bat World Sanctuary <sanctuary@batworld.org>
Sent: Wednesday, October 29, 2008 5:54:49 PM
Subject: Re: bat specimens in jars

The bat specimens we carry, of which there are only 2 bats and 4 diaphanous bats, were purchased from a museum specimen preparer who was retiring and selling off any remaining specimens. The age of the specimens is unknown, but they were definitely collected years ago. We have no contact with anyone else dealing in bat specimens and will not be ordering more. We have since stopped selling the mounted bat skeleton as well.

We try to make it a point at Dapper Cadaver not to deal in any specimens of rare animals, and all the real specimens we do have are common lab, livestock, or game animals. Unfortunately I am not a bat expert and was not able to positively ID the species of bat specimens we acquired.

I wholeheartedly support your work. I have volunteered at a veterinary clinic and a bird sanctuary and have been involved in several animal rescues including one bat rescue (it was trapped in a mall).

Best regards,
BJ Winslow
Owner-Artist
Dapper Cadaver
323-962-1924
www.bjwinslow.com
www.dappercadaver.com

Link to BJ Winslow.com by clipping the code below and adding it to your webpage
<a rel=”nofollow” target=”_blank” href=”http://www.bjwinslow.com“>
<img src=”http://www.bjwinslow.com/albums/graphics/bjwinslowbannerjpg2.jpg“></a>

Flag this message

Re: bat specimens in jars

Thursday, October 30, 2008 12:54 PM
From:

Add sender to Contacts

To:
customcorpse@yahoo.com
<!–#yiv378659085 DIV {margin:0px;}–>

Dear BJ,

Thank you for your response. I’ve very happy to know the specimens you have on hand are not among those that come from NM.

Sincerely,

Amanda

Amanda Lollar, Founder/President

Bat World Sanctuary

www.batworld.org

Bat World Sanctuary is a non-profit,
all volunteer organization that provides
rescue
for bats worldwide. For more
information
about bats and how they
make our world a better place please
visit
www.batworld.org

DIY Halloween: Becoming a better creature


COFFIN dead marilyn John Ganun, originally uploaded by Boju.

When I was a kid I loved monster masks. Every Halloween I wanted to have the coolest scariest Halloween costume and mask, and when I was a kid masks were great because I could get a couple and hit the houses with the best candy over and over.

As an adult though masks present some major problems. First you can’t drink. Second my glasses fog up. Third you can’t drink and Fourth it muffles your ability to talk. Solution? Ditch the mask and build a better creature with make up, prosthetics, contacts, and props.

As the owner of the Halloween shop Dapper Cadaver I’m amazed at how many people are reluctant to do any make up but still buy masks. Believe me the mask is 100 times more unpleasant to wear then some prosthetics. Plus, prosthetics transform your face without hiding it so you still look alive.

Then just add some creepy FX contact lenses like the kind they have at Lens Shopper and you go from an average joe to a creature from beyond.

Be sure to order early, I don’t sell contact lenses and I can’t tell you how many people call me desperately in the 11th hour looking for some.

For prosthetics I usually use cinema secrets. They stick to the face easily with spirit gum / spirit glue and they can be colored with practically any make up. Don’t be intimidated by the shear variety of make up available. Unless you know you’re a make up artist go with the simple stuff. Believe me, when it’s dark out or in the club no one can see the small details anyway, what they see is “holy crap that guy really has a cut up face and creature eyes!”

My friends and I in monster make up:
Halloween 2008

Halloween 2007

Halloween 2006

Halloween 2005

Monster Mondays – Save the Water Monster, Axolotl


axolotl precioso, originally uploaded by girl next door ...

In the canals beneath Mexico City and in the lake that surrounds it lives the Axolotl or “Water Monster.” It is an ancient race of up to 2 ft long salamander that Aztecs say are the direct descendent’s of Xototl, the dog headed god of Death. I think they look more like pokemon with their cartoonish eyes and mouths and anime style external gills.

In 1998 the waters of Lake Xochimilco held 1500 axolotl per square mile, when surveyed this year it was a mere 25 per square mile. Scientists are now saying this otherworldly creature may only have five years left on the planet before it succumbs to extinction.


“What are axolotl good for?” you might ask. Well, they’re good for a lot of things. First off they’re inherently good. Then their bizarre appearance and gentle nature make them excellent pets. Or excellent tamales. Their soft flesh is apparently delicious and has been part of the Aztec and Mexican diet as long as there have been people there. The locals also make folk medicine with them.

They’re also true freaks. They become sexually mature adults while still in the larval stage, and can remain larval their entire lives. That’s like a race of polliwogs that breed and grow huge and never turn into frogs. This strange condition makes them able to regrow lost limbs, tails, nerve, heart, and brain cells. Science has long utilized these creatures in studies about regeneration, gene therapy, evolution, fertilization and the cures for certain diseases.

If we save the Axolotl we’ll be preserving a cute, delicious, wonder of nature that may be able to cure us of degenerative nerve diseases and make great pets. That should be more then enough reason to get involved.

They seam to be dying do to a combination of water pollution and the introduction of Tilapia to Lake Xochimilco. The Tilapia eat the axolotls eggs and young.

Scientists are rushing to establish Axolotl sanctuaries, most notably around the Isle of Dolls or La Isla de las Muñecas, so called because it inhabited by an eccentric old man who fishes doll from the lake and hangs them from every part of the island to ward off evil spirits. Could he be the axolotls savior?


If you’re interested in helping save the water monster, don’t eat Mexican Tilapia for starters. I’ve tried to find the organizations setting up the sanctuaries so that we can be more directly involved. If I get their contact info, I’ll post it here so everyone can help. Apparently it’s not easy to set up a wildlife sanctuary by Mexico City.

UPDATE

The International Union for the Conservation of Nature has put the Axolotl on its critical Red List. The Amphibian Department of the IUCN can be reached at the info below. Please contact them if you’d like to help save the water monster.

-BJ

Robin Moore, Ph.D
Amphibian Conservation Officer
Conservation International
2011 Crystal Drive, Suite 500
Arlington, VA 22202

Email: asg@conservation.org

Scariest Political Costumes

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hillraiser, originally uploaded by Boju.

The scariest day of 2008 will come five days AFTER Halloween, will we be electing the political team of an inexperienced newbie and a grumpy old man or ….wait I guess that’s both choices. If you’re feeling patriotic this Halloween, instead of just going for a rubber mask and a suit, why not do something truly monstrous with the candidates? Allow me to offer the following suggestions-

7. Hellraiser fetish robe + Hillary Clinton mask=
HELLARY or HILLRAISER
(see image above)

6. JOHN EDWARDSCISSORHANDS

“How about a $30,000 Haircut?”

5. PALIN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE
The dumbest VP ever made.

“You know the difference between a Republican VP and a brain eating zombie resurrected by people from outer space? Lipstick.”

4. BARACKULA
A mysterious creature who lure his victims with an unearthly charm.

“Fear you can believe in!”

3. McCAINENSTEIN
A living maverick stitched together from the corpses of previous Republican campaigns

“I can only lift my arms this high!”

2. The Creature from the Barack Lagoon

He doesn’t look like other men, because he’s a fish-man, and he’ll play the species card.

1. THE TEXAS McCAINSAW MASSACRE
His bloody saw isn’t just for cutting taxes…you’re next!

Dark Spots in Tinsel Town: The Haunted Valley

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Attack Boju, originally uploaded by Boju.

by BJ Winslow

As part of my quest here at Dapper Cadaver to leave no gravestone unturned I am adding a new feature to the Dapper Cadaver Blog – Haunted Los Angeles. There are over 300 different neighborhoods in Los Angeles- from out of the way spots like Aliso Village and the Yucca Corridor, and of corpse Hollywood, Downtown, Venice, and the other big deal parts of town, and every single one of them has strange specters afoot.

I’ll start with The San Fernando Valley, AKA “The Valley”

Slymar-
The northern most burb of The Vally boasts 2 paranormal epicenters that have garnered national attention. An alleged Gravity Hill in Lopez Canyon where naughty objects openly break the law of nature and apparently roll UP HILL, and a possessed statue in Glen Haven Memorial park that witness claim walks the grounds on certain nights.

Granada Hills-
Here you’ll find the home base of the independent production company Spooked TV News. We worked together on a film called Death Tunnel set in a real haunted ayslum. Best title in their catalog? “Ghouls Gone Wild”

Chatsworth-
Home of one of the largest, oldest, and most beloved Haunted Mansions in the Valley, Chatsworth is a mecca in The Valley for families looking for a fright. The attraction? Spooky House. Look for the flickering neon sign and the Bates Motel exterior. Inside you’ll find scenes of murder and insanity and more costumed actors then you can throw a pumpkin at.

North Hills-
At James Monroe High School witnesses have heard loud footsteps and opening and closing of doors when the halls are lonely. The girls gym room is haunted. Students have heard lockers open and close when no one is present.

Mission Hills-
At the Mission San Fernando Cemetery a apparition of a lady in a white dress and a white scarf on her head has been seen praying in the front row of the chapel. She has appeared both ghostly, or solid at first, then vanishing in the air.

Pacoima-
Pacoima was home to Etta Smith, an otherwise normal professional who made the news in 1980 in a very unusual case.
From CNN.com
“A nurse named Melanie Uribe vanishes on her way to work without any suspects or physical evidence. Los Angeles detectives are searching without a map for the missing woman. But one woman, Etta Smith, feels she knows exactly where Melanie Uribe is. How? A psychic vision supplied her with the exact location of the missing nurse…

Etta doesn’t know Melanie Urbie, but she’s sure that the images flooding her mind are connected to her disappearance. Detective Ryan knows that every second counts in the hunt for a missing person. Could Etta Smith’s psychic clues give them a much needed break in the case? Etta Smith’s vision becomes a reality, when she sees the exact location flash in front of her eyes.

Now, investigators left to make sense of a bizarre chain of events. A woman goes to the remote canyon and finds the body of a murder victim she claims she’s never met. It seems like an improbable feat. So improbable, that Etta Smith becomes suspect No. 1 in the murder of Melanie Uribe.”

For the rest of the article visit CNN.com here

Shadow Hills-
Despite its ready for horror sounding name, I could find nothing spooky about Shadow Hills. Correct me if I’m wrong Shadow People!

Sunland-
Something must be happening in Sunland, because in the past few years both Ghost Ride Productions and UFO Magazine moved their shops elsewhere. What’s going on there that’s scaring off the spookies?

Tujunga-
The Eastern end of the San Fernando Valley features a famous UFO sighting and a famous haunted house. Good job Tujunga!
For Ghosts it’s The Bolton Hall Museum. Investigative groups have documented paranormal phenomena on numerous occasions at Bolton hall over the past few years here. Supposedly, six spirits haunt this now historic museum. A W.W.II soldier, a blonde haired woman dressed in a Victorian style dress, a young girl with red hair, two older gentlemen with white hair and beards, one is missing and eye and
the other is missing a leg and in addition, a tall well dress man is also seen.

The book Situation Red documents a 1975 UFO sighting over Tujunga. The article can be found here

Sun Valley-
Quite probably the most unusual spot in the whole valley. Paranormal and Haunting things you can find in Sun Valley-
Michael J. Kouri, famous ghost seer, spirit communicator, TV Ghost expert, and paranormal author.
A 13th degree Rosicrucian mother who can send telepathic roses to her children.
A mall that a plane crashed into and is now haunted.
A haunted power plant.
And, my personal favorite, a man who is tying to sell his haunted house for $400,000 Lets see if the price comes down. Does a house in need of an exorcism count as a fixer upper?
Here’s the description-
“I lived grew up in that house, and I can tell you from first hand experience that there is something there. We would hear footsteps at night, we would feel like we were being followed down the hallway to the bedrooms to the right of the house. We would see shadows at night and we would also have things fall off of shelves for no apparent reason as if they were pushed. We were never hurt by the energy, but our family did tend to fight more when we were in the house. We always wanted to get a priest in there to bless it but we never did. Then we moved. If you are considering buying this house, please make sure to bless it.”

_______________________________

That’s it for the Dapper Cadaver tour of the Haunted Valley…for now. I’ll be going through the neighborhoods of Los Angeles one by one hunting for hauntings and other unusual apparitions between now and Halloween 2008. Halloween parties, Haunted Houses real and man made, horror movies, spooky stores and all things gory are on the menu. If you have a ghost story to share, let me know.

Monster Mondays: Too Many Bigfoots

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yeti-sasquatch_low, originally uploaded by Boju.

Dapper Cadaver is going to to be visited by the Believe It Tour on Friday, Sept 26th as part of their ongoing quest to teach and learn about the all mysterious of the universe, but mainly Bigfoot.

In honor of the ambassadors of Sasquatch, I’m using Monster Mondays to shine some light on the whole Bigfoot clan. Cause there’s lots of bigfoots, or bigfeet as their known to “science.”

Think you can tell a wookie from Harry and The Hendersons? Take this quiz and find out. I’ll send something weird to the first person who get all the bigfoots correctly identified.

1. This Bigfoot lives in Brittish Columbia. It is 12 feet tall with bizarre long arms that end in yellow paddles. Unlike most apes, it only has 4 toes on its feet.

2. Native to Australia, Aborigines see this creature as part lizard, part ant, but the Brittish colonists saw it as a gorilla-size ape man resembling an orangutan.

3. Another 4 toed bigfoot, this one is from Malaysia. It resembles a black orangutan but walks like a man. It’s name means Snaggle Toothed Ghost.

4. This beast is believed by locals to be an ape-demon who converted to Buddhism. For this reason, they keep evidence of its existence enshrined in their monasteries.

5. A native to Vietnam, this bigfoot is only 6 feet tall. He’s covered in fur except for his noticeably bald knees. He eats fruit, leaves, monkeys, and bats.

6. This bigfoot stands anywhere from 5 to 10 feet tall and is covered in red fur. He lives in an enchanted part of China where rates of albinism amongst animals runs unusually high.

7. This is the bigfoot of the Southeast United States, a swamp dweller who smells like rotten eggs.

8. This bigfoot was found dead in Pennsylvania. Witnesses say it had large eyes, human features and was mask-like in appearance; large muscles, flat buttocks, 13 inch-long feet, a 6 inch-long penis, and smelled like a damp dog

9. This bigfoot looks like a man covered in fur but is only 3 feet tall. He lives in Sumatra.

10. This is an allegedly extinct prehistoric ape that stood over 10 feet tall and ate tough plant matter. It’s jawbones and skull fragments have been found in China.

11. This Scottish bigfoot is tall and lanky, covered in gray fur, and said to have a ghost like presence.

12. This is a bigfoot from Ontario Canada that looks like a normal bigfoot, except its head and mane are blond.

13. This ape man from Pakistan and Afghanistan sometimes is seen wearing crude animal skin clothing. He also has a nasty habit of kidnapping local women and attempting to mate with them.

14. This Missouri bigfoot is notable for it’s pumpkin like head.

15. Apelike descendants of australopithecines, the first human species. This group diverged and remained a hairy, bipedal ape that some believe may still exist as bigfoot.

16. An Ohio bigfoot found more in the grasslands than the forests.

17. This Mongolian ape-man is speculated to be a relic tribe of Neanderthals. Stories of them have them somewhat successfully interbreeding with humans.

The QUIZ has been won. The Answers are below

1. Pitt Lake Giant

2. The Yowie

3. Orang Mawa

4. Yeti

5.Người Rừng

6. Yeren

7. Skunk Ape

8. Pennsylvania creature

9. Orang Pendek

10. Gigantopithecus

11. Grayman/ fear liath

12. old yellow top

13. Barmanu

14. Momo the Monster

15.Paranthropus / robust australopithecines

16. Grassman

17. Almas

Monster Mondays: Wisconsin Weirdos

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hodag_capture, originally uploaded by Boju.

This edition of Dapper Cadaver’s Monster Monday’s is dedicated to my lovely Wisonsonian wife, Eileen.

Wisconsinites are a weird breed. As well as the beer basket of America, they’re also the home of Barnum and Baily, the House on The Rock, The Forevertron, and the only company in America that still makes straight jackets for use in mental institutions. Likewise their monsters fall a bit on the strange side. The following beasts are only visible to Wisconsinians.

Hodag –
The beast pictured above. A small rhino/dragon like beast that is the earthbound soul of Minnesota’s Babe the Blue Ox. The hodag had risen from the ashes of the ox. It was born when Paul Bunyan’s ox, Babe, was burned for seven years to cleanse its soul of the profanity hurled at it by lumberjacks and its master. The cleansed part of the oxes soul went to Heaven, and from the earthbound ashes rose the foul smelling Hodag. The hodag is now a popular team mascot for various Wisconsin teams.

Hoopsnake-
Rather than slithering, the hoopsnake bites it’s tale and rolls down hill like a hula hoop.

Birdman-
Spotted on a farm near Highway 82, the birdman is described as being 6 ft tall, with an enormous beak, and covered with yellow feathers. Farms where the birdman was seen recovered large yellow feathers. Young children in the area said they saw Sesame Street’s Big Bird outside their window.

Gallinipper-
A man lay in bed sleeping when her heard 2 droning voices. He opened his eyes without moving to see 2 mosquitoes over 1 feet long standing on his chest discussing their meal.
Mosquito 1: Should we eat him here or carrying him out?
Mosquito 2: We’ll eat him here. If we carry him out he might get stolen by one of big ones!
The Wisconsin mosquitos over 2 feet long are Gallinippers.

Agropelter-
The Argopelter was rarely seen, and no distinct description exists. However, it was said to inhabit hollow tree trunks in the forest. From this vantage point the creature would await any unwary person and hurl wooden splinters and branches at him or her. Although the human could sustain serious injury, there is no record of assault past this initial bombardment.

Whatsit-
A small gray rodent like creature unlike any found in Wisconsin. The Whatsit was found in 1939 on a farm in Elkhorn. Since everything on the farm was black and white, the farmer didn’t want a creature around messing up his color scheme so he gave the whatsit to a man named Adams. Adams found the Whatsit would eat only bananas and soon it gave birth to 2 little whatsits. The whatsit is now believed to be a Vesper Rat from Costa Rica.

Gillygaloo –
The gillygaloo is a large bird that lays square eggs on the sides of hills so they don’t roll away. It’s eggs can be hard boiled and used as dice.

Wolfman – Beast of Bray Road
Wisconsin is home to the most well documented werewolf in the world, and the only wolfman Cryptozoologists take seriously- The Beast of Bray Road. While it’s not believed to be Larry Talbots Wisconsin cousin transforming into a wolf, it is believed to be a six foot tall bipedal wolf, or if that’s too far fetched, then a wolf-like bigfoot named Eddy. Others think it’s a furry in costume pulling pranks. Others think it’s a regular wolf and people are hallucinating the walking around part.

Cheese Heads
These strange creatures are half-man half-cheese. They only come out from September to January. The young ones squeek. And most terrifying of all, they are unkillable

Decorating a Halloween Party

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halloween greetings, originally uploaded by Boju.

Unlike a Haunted House, where the decor is the event, when decorating a Halloween party you’ve got the added challenge of needing to set up the normal party places – a bar, a dance floor, a buffet, social space, bathrooms, but give them a twisted edge. Here are some tips for decorating a killer Halloween party or event, and where to find the supplies.

1. Decorating a Halloween Bar.
Mad science just works in the bar. Set up black lights or black light spotlights around your bar area. Stock up on tonic water. Tonic water contains quinine which is naturally black light responsive. So gin and tonic is going to glow like radioactive spider venom. Add some small bits of dry ice to get it fully foamy. Brown liquors and wine can be dyed red with food coloring to look like blood. Add vintage labels for effect. Serve drinks in laboratory glassware. Spice up the booze bottle collection by adding assorted specimen jars.
Laboratory glassware is available for rent here anf for sale here
Specimen Jars are available for rental here and for sale here
Oh and one more thing Skull Beer Bong!

2. The Dance Floor.
All the best Halloween parties have a dance floor. The biggest thing you’ll need is just a large space where people can dance without running into things. That leaves props for either high above them, or on stage. For hanging props nothing is more impressive than a hanging skeleton cage or gibbet, especially hung from a lamp as a chandelier or in the cross beams of some spotlights. Either way your going to get great creepy shadows. BJ Winslow.com in Los Angeles rents gibbets that are life size but made of light weight plastic that can be hung anywhere. For the stage a great backdrop can really set the mood. The backdrop should be large and colorful enough to stand out. If your performer is a DJ or keyboardist, a casket is a great prop to set up their turntable or keyboard in. Smoke machines are important to dance floors year round. For added creepiness, try getting your fog cold so it clings to the floor like cemetery mist. Avoid low lying fog machines with small chill chambers. The best fog chillers have a refrigerator cooling element built in. A budget version is to feed the fog machine into a cooler filled with ice or dry ice and a small fan to push it along.

3. The Halloween Buffet.
Great Halloween buffets make people think twice about eating the meat. Try setting up your kitchen as a Cannibals Meat Locker and mix severed heads and skinned bodies in with your cold cuts and melon balls. Autopsy bodies make great cake pans Drizzle deserts with delicious Butterscotch blood Shape both deserts and dips into human organs with Body part molds After all, you are what you eat! For snacks, use leech jars as cookie jars.

4. Halloween Party Social Space.
Nothing helps people relax more than torture gear. Get a couple of electric chairs set up for people to sit in, maybe a stocks, and plenty of safety weapons so people can wail on each other while they chat. Plant a few decoy corpses in the space to encourage people to congregate there. People can also sit on autopsy tables, wheelchairs and hospital beds, but not caskets. Casket lids aren’t designed to take the weight and will break.

5. Smokers lounge.
Where there’s smoke there’s fire, and where there’s fire, theirs Hell. Make the smokers lounge a lair of fire and brimstone with smoke machines, candles, and randomly flickering orange and red lights Add some devil props and your Halloween Party is smokin’!

6. The Bathroom.
Bathrooms are fun because they’re an opportunity to get people alone, so a nice horrific scare can be really effective here. They’re also great because glass, tile, and porcelain surfaces are hard to stain, so get as bloody as you want. Dry ice is activated by water, so try hiding some in the toilet reservoir.