I’m sharing my new room in Hispanic Korea Town with a Demon that eats hats. I call him Horror Head.
A few weeks before I moved in I found him on the railroad tracks in Hawthorne. I’ve always loved railroad tracks, whether the landscape is rolling hills of grass, scatterd trees, deep forests, or cities traintracks cut through it like a rift. They even look like a stiched up scar. It’s a liminal zone, a boundary ungoverned by the rules of the surrounding zones. Things found there are weird, they’ve got power.
That’s where I found Horror Head, a styrofoam wig model covered inthis weird wrinkly brown skin, that tears off his face and sticks out like a mummy-skin blinder with peg teeth. His eyes and mouth have been gouged deep into his skull. I don’t know where he came from, or how many hands he passed through before finding me, but I knew when I found him I needed to take him home. That’s interesteing, you know?
When I picked him up I let a shiver run through my body. It looked posessed, and so for Chris’s benefit I acted like it was speaking through me. In an exorsist voice I spoke.
“At last! I have been awaken. Prepare yourself for the horror of a world without hat! Yesss, a hatless nightmare world is what my awakening ushers in. From now on, when your head grows cold you must use a hood to over it! Can your mind handle my horror!”
I thought I was just being weird, but soon after Horror Head came home with me hats actually started dissappearing. Three so far, but big ones, my cowboy hat, my top hat (non-collapsing kind), and Dylan’s cabby cap. Eileen says Horror Head has been appearing in her dreams. usually just as flashes. Maybe he really was speaking through me, or more likely, this is like in Ghostbusters where whoever awakens the destructor choses the form of their destruction. You all better get down on your hands and knees and blow me for chosing a world without hats. Imagine if some misanthrope like John Tesh found him, we’d all be food for his ravenous ego.
And for that reason I can’t just get rid of it. Then it will fall into the wrong hands. No, I must seal it. Plus, takening on the Horror head just seems more interesting than throwing out the Horror Head. I’m going to take it into the big Catholic Cathedral near my house and see if they can exorcise the demon that eats hats. I’ll let you know how that turns out. I almost did it today but there was a wedding going on, and I don’t think they’d appreciate my mission very much.